Giving Before You Get

Sorry for the slow updates - I've been busting my butt trying to make some things happen. Remember, this site is about a guy making the move from employee to self-employed, not about a guy who already did. There are tons of things I want to cover, but something that was a sticking point for me to understand (and something I'm still understanding,) is the concept of giving before you get. In theory it sounds great. In practice, it can be a little more difficult to begin.

We often taught by the world to "get yours" and that you can only count on yourself. Trusting other people, or being generous in a forthright manner are very strange concepts to many people. Maybe that's why so much of the world is screwed up! How can people come together to accomplish anything when the subset thought process is, "well regardless of what happens here, I'm going to get mine." I'm sorry, but I'm not finding success happening in any way where I try and get mine before giving, or more correctly put, serving someone else.

Attempting to get without giving is like saying, "as soon as this fireplace provides me with heat, I'll throw some logs in." Or, "As soon as this business venture starts producing, I'll really invest in it. " The concept of making sure you're taken care of sounds almost right when you think it to yourself, but put into that context, it all of a sudden doesn't make sense. Considering that innate laws tend to be true in all things, I'm working harder to give first in every area of my life.

I used to be somewhat of a menacing driver. I grew up driving in the big city and could ride a closing lane to the very last moment, cut you off, flip the bird while still singing to whatever useless song was playing in my car, and then not let anyone else in. Since trying to give first, I've definitely been more relenting in letting people get in front of me, but you know what? My ingress into merging traffic seems to be a lot less stressful and a lot simpler as well.

You can call it sowing and reaping; you can call it positive energy flow; you can call it creating good karma - it's all the same thing. It's attempting to serve or give first, not with the selfish thought that you will then be owed a favor, but with the selfless belief that maybe someone will be eager to serve you. I have worked on being willing to give time I don't think I have to help out new guys I'm working with. I have worked on continuing to invest in my business, even when the return wasn't quite there, as well as investing in the people I'm trying to help, even though many of them have disappeared.

Whether it's tithing at your church or just being willing to hold the door open for people, giving before you get is a sure-fire way to get the prosperity you seek.

You Are Worthy (The Core Of Success)

One of the main things I tend to be facing with the new guys I work with, and more importantly, with the guys who've been around a bit, is self-worth. It seems that somewhere in the core of every person, is a level of deserving. It's not the same for every person and what is amazing is that for many people, it's not very high. Knowing that you are worthy of not only the success that happens to come your way, and the success you decide to chase, is to me, the core component of success. If you believe that you deserve whatever successes you have, the odds of you becoming successful grow.

I had heard once that everything has a 'natural' state. Take H20 for example. You can freeze it and turn it into ice, or you can heat it and turn into steam or vapor. The mind also has a natural state and for the majority of the population, it's negative. Left to our own devices, our thoughts often turn negative. Have you ever had a parent or a loved one that was supposed to come to your home only to have them not only, not show, but you can't reach them for an extended period of time? What was your first thought? Concern? Fear? It happens to all of us.

So why is all this important? Success can only occur in a positive state of mind. Anyone who has ever succeeded at a high level in any endeavor had to positively believe they would do so. That is why any book on success worth it's salt usually has at least a chapter on having a positive mental attitude. What's more vital than having a positive mental attitude in what you say to others and how you act outwardly is having one in your internal thoughts and how you feel on the inside. At the core of this is your self-image. Your self-worth.

We have been trained, be it by the limitations our parents put on us ("we're just not the entrepreneurial type - we're blue collar") or by our teachers ("your scores show you should be a janitor.") Over time, we build up what we determine our self-worth is through our associations, our gender, our race, and what we do for a living. Let me tell you right now, if you think your creator has it in for whatever supposed limiting factor you believe you have, you have another thing coming. A higher power is not what determined that you should make $30K/year as a gopher in an office.

Here's what I believe: you're meant for more. There is no way that such complex individuals such as human beings would develop to the level that we've developed to, to simply waste away manning cubicle 74 on the 8th floor of a non-descript downtown hi-rise. Me believing only does part of the trick because you have to believe also. I heard once that the "you" of today is simply a reflection of the "you" of yesterday, and at any time you can make changes to improve the "you" of tomorrow. We so often get caught up in our past failures that we let them control our potential to make a difference in our future successes. We hang on to old desires, old habits, and old thought processes that are at best comforting and at worst destructive.

You have value. You can draw a line in the sand and change the path of your world now. It's a common anecdote, but before Roger Bannister ran the four minute mile, it was considered "impossible." How many people did it take to prove it could be done? One, and now over 1500 people have accomplished the feat. How many people does it take to raise themselves up from nothing to prove to you that you can do it to? Take your reason for previous failure and make it the reason why you succeed now. Let that thing that you hate to remember that you did, be what drives you to become more. I believe in you. You are worthy.